If Lullabies Could Kill

FYI - The Rockabye Baby CDs are a little weak. I'm not sure exactly what I expected, but let's put it this way...if even I can't immediately recognize Bob Marley's "One Love", then you know it ain't good. Additionally, I'm pretty sure that I could have banged out a similar rendition way back when we used to get to experiment with the xylophone in elementary school. That's right - the XYLOPHONE. "One Love" has taken a sad turn for the worse in a rendition that truly involves nothing other than a snooze inducing xylophone tap session. If the next song starts and they are playing "No Woman, No Cry" on the recorder, I might have to chuck the CD out the window and apologize to the reggae gods for having purchased such a sad, making-Bob-roll-over-in-his-grave, excuse for a CD. Why I thought a Lullaby rendition of these songs might be better for baby than the real thing, I can't imagine, but over my dead body will Orange Seed think that this is what Bob Marley and The Beatles are supposed to sound like.

Oh wait...I stand corrected. That is not a xylophone, it is a glockenspiel. Apparently there are also a vibraphone and mellotron in there somewhere. If anyone knows what a mellotron is, by all means enlighten me. Its name conjures up images of a slightly effeminate and exceedingly boring Transformer and its sound isn't a whole lot better.

On a side note, does anyone remember playing the glockenspiel in elementary school?




They used to give you those felt tipped mallets and then tell you to play it as though there was glue on the mallet. "Tap the key and then slowly pull away." I have vivid memories of those sessions. Maybe because I was forced to tap out good songs in an all together inappropriately Tinkerbell sounding manner. That's it! This CD sounds like Bob Marley was kidnapped and rehabilitated into a happy-happy-joy-joy fairy with a tooshie that makes little tinkling bell sounds when he shakes it. Oh Bob, I am so sorry....